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Saturday, May 10, 2014

DOOR - Five Sentence Fiction #SaturdayScenes #SSFlashFiction


This is my first post for #SaturdayScenes.
I hope you enjoy it and will come back next week for another #SSFlashFiction tale!


[source]
Walking up the overgrown path to the house, her head swiveled from side to side as she surveyed her surroundings, sweat dripping down the front of her neck, accompanied by warning prickle down the back, she was anxious to leave the deserted neighborhood.

She approached the old wooden door, hanging in the frame by a thread and softly knocked, her head pounding a synchronous warning to be careful, jumping back as the door swung open, seemingly creaking in pain on the rusty hinges, then cautiously stuck her head inside whispering, "Hello, is anyone here?"

Darkness enveloped the interior, lit only by a stream of sunshine as the door swung wider, a soft keening sound coming from the corner of the room.

She turned on the flashlight she pulled from her back pocket and searched for the source of the sound, biting her lip as she saw the source, a small malnourished puppy in the corner.

She carefully picked him up, smiling as he licked her face and crooned, "It's okay now little one, you're going to be fine, you're rescued and coming home with me forever."


Lillie McFerrin Writes

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13 comments:

  1. UnknownMay 10, 2014 at 12:26 PM

    What a sweet ending.

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  2. Lisa ShambrookMay 10, 2014 at 1:42 PM

    So cute! I was as nervous as she was as she went in...great ending!

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  3. UnknownMay 10, 2014 at 2:05 PM

    This is the cutest!! Such a gorgeous ending after the tense build up. x

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  4. Donna BurmanMay 10, 2014 at 2:44 PM

    Okay you had me seriously worried initially!! But a wonderful ending. :D Cute..

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  5. AnonymousMay 10, 2014 at 10:53 PM

    That is one of a twist ending .. Great.. :)

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  6. AnonymousMay 10, 2014 at 11:52 PM

    I love the happy ending, great twist after the tense build-up. I was so sure something sinister was going to happen!

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  7. Donna B. McNicolMay 11, 2014 at 12:26 AM

    Thank you ALL for stopping by and commenting...I almost went dark at the end but preferred the image of a puppy rescue. ;)

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    Replies
    1. K R SmithMay 14, 2014 at 8:54 AM

      I can see how your story could go either way. Perhaps the next time that hppens you can treat us to both!

      Delete
  8. sjpMay 11, 2014 at 4:51 AM

    Poor puppy :) It's funny how much of a fine line there can be between dark and uplifting.

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  9. AditiMay 11, 2014 at 9:18 AM

    Whoaaa...you saved this piece from going dark ;) Loved the sweet ending! :)

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  10. Miranda KateMay 11, 2014 at 11:20 AM

    Wow, thought it was going to be thriller, horror, ghosty and then the cupiest thing ever, rescuing a little pup! Great work.

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  11. UnknownMay 12, 2014 at 11:26 AM

    Didn't expect this tale to read to a rescue, fab x

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  12. Donna B. McNicolMay 14, 2014 at 5:37 PM

    Glad everyone enjoyed it and thanks for stopping by and commenting!

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