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Wednesday, June 5, 2019

Friday Fictioneers: Fourteen

My contribution to Rochelle Wisoff-Field's Friday Fictioneers...
PHOTO PROMPT © Ceayr
"...twelve, thirteen, fourteen!" he announced proudly. "I'm fourteen and our new home has fourteen steps. Isn't that the best?"


She smile and ruffled his hair before unlocking the front door. This was to be their dream home. But then again, the last one was supposed to be, and the three before that. They'd had to move and hide over and over, but this time, this time it would work. She was sure of it.

"Come in and check out your bed-" She stopped short.

"Hi, Glenda. I see you brought my boy home to me." He had found them again.

Click the frog, please!

43 comments:

  1. Time for a new dream house. Some shadows never leave.

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  2. i like her positive outlook. hopefully, she'd strike gold someday.

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  3. He found them even before they got through the front door this time. Quite chilling!

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  4. Great psychodrama. The detail of the child counting steps was marvellous

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    1. Some noticed the jacket, some the downstairs, for me it was the step that jumped out at me so they became the feature. Thanks for taking time to read & comment, Neil.

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    1. Thank you, Sandra. Too many women & children dealing with this.

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  6. It seems her ex is always one step ahead of them. What psycho. Well written, Donna.

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  7. There seems to be no escaping him. Nice chiller.

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    1. He does seem to always be one step ahead...you have to wonder how (or who).

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  8. Wow, that's scary! Hope they manage to get away for good one of these times.

    Janet’s Smiles

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  9. Awww .... I was so happy for the boy.
    Sadly, this is happening more than we think.
    Super captivating ending.
    Isadora 😎

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    1. I had no intention of ending that way, but you know what happens - the story writes itself sometimes. It's so sad but true that too many are dealing with situations like this. Thanks for stopping by to read & comment, it's much appreciated.

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  10. That's a rough situation. What can one do? Name change? Cut off from everyone she knows?

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    1. I suspect she had already been doing that, but he had ways....sad.

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  11. Dear Donna,

    That was a sinister ending. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. Thank you, Rochelle. The ending surprised me, too!

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  12. Really good job of capturing the shock and the sadness all at the same time.

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  13. I love the way your story started, how it ended, and everything in between. Good writing!

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  14. Just when she thought it was over, that happened. Seems there's no hiding place for them. Great take Donna.

    My go at Friday Fictioneers!

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  15. Excellent handling of a difficult topic.
    Abuse victim, I guess, never being allowed to escape.

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  16. Chilling, to be stalked by such a man.

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  17. Nice contrast between the innocence of the child and the reality of the situation. I think someone's telling tales - she might need to find out who it is if she's going to escape.

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  18. Oy. How does he find them before they've even moved in? She needs to get some professional help in covering her tracks. Or find out who the snitch is.

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    1. Yes she does...I think she thought she had done enough but obviously she hadn't.

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  19. What a shame. All that running for nothing. A good, well-written story, Donna. ---- Suzanne

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    1. Thank you, Suzanne. Let's hope they get another chance!

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  20. Dammit!
    I was so hoping this was it...

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    1. So was I...then that last sentence wrote itself. Sigh...

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  21. That was a quite a chilling twist at the end. Maybe all those plants could do with some blood and bone fertilizer.....

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    1. Ooooh, I like that idea! LOL! Thanks for taking time to visit and comment.

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